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What is not okay is lashing out in anger, saying things that you know you’ll regret later, or kicking her out of the house immediately. That means that if you kick her out, you are 1) endangering your own daughter and 2) you are endangering your growing grandbaby.This is still your daughter, no matter what she has gotten herself into. Here are some suggestions from mothers and fathers of teenagers: You might be tempted to think it is mostly the boyfriend’s fault, and in some cases, you’d be correct.
It is also important to hear your daughter out about what her plans were.
Perhaps she already has an idea in mind about how to go about childcare.
If your daughter lives under your roof, obviously she has to abide by your rules.
And if she won’t, you will need to sort out temporary to long-term alternate housing.
Ask him what he plans to do, now that he and your daughter are in this situation. This means that you will be able to help her sort through her options while knowing a little better than a counselor about her hopes, dreams, morals, and desires. Offer to take her to the doctor so that she can get a full prenatal check up and an ultrasound to confirm the pregnancy.
Whatever she chooses, getting an ultrasound to confirm the viability and age of the pregnancy is a necessary step.
If you’ve known the guy for a while, maybe you have a better idea of who he is, and if not, maybe you need to get a few more impressions of the guy before coming to a final conclusion about who he is. Does he love your daughter/can he see marrying her someday? This may be hard to swallow, but as we’ve already gone over, she did get herself into this situation. Hear her out, and of course, you can insert your opinion too and explain your reasoning.
Make sure to see how your daughter feels about him before encouraging him to be around before asking him to stay away from her. After 14 years of raising her, you probably know her pretty well (though she might deny it). You might help her realize things she hadn’t even considered.
Whether you have a suspicion that your teenage daughter could be pregnant or she just broke the news to you, your head is probably spinning with a million different thoughts and emotions. This might mean sitting in silence for a few minutes to gather your thoughts before responding. But, she is now responsible for a tiny life growing inside her.
If you’re a pregnant teenager and you’re on this page, try to use it to get some insight into how your parents may be feeling and how you can react to keep the tension down. Try not to let your emotions take over and dictate what you say to your daughter – this is a delicate moment, after all.
Some teen moms assume that her parents will be the main ones to babysit and that they’ll do it for free. This is something you will want to talk over as early as possible. For what reasons won’t you (a date, social events, school, etc)?